Summer brings hope, joy and a rejuvenated spirit that suppresses those winter feels as you are able to enjoy life again. But just as you thought that all your summer dreams were coming true…
BAM… it hits you, the first sneeze. Before you can reach for the Kleenex… BAM… a second one. It’s happened. “I thought I had more time!” you despair. You don’t.
Hay fever has you now. She is a cruel mistress and she won’t leave without a fight, prepare for the struggle as you watch the daily pollen count on BBC Breakfast and pray for a hay fever armistice.
“Yo, your palms are sweaty, eyes weak, nose is runny. You’ve got bogies on your collar already, snot spaghetti.”
Hay fever is actually known as allergic rhinitis. It’s an allergic reaction to pollen, which is FANTASTIC given that the Isle of Man is covered in grass and plants.
Throw some wind in there, blowing the pollen from Bride to Port Erin, and you have yourself the hay fever equivalent of Mecca.
Symptoms include violent sneezing, blocked nose, nose diarrhoea, watery or swollen eyes, itchy throat and potential death.
Hay fever to non-sufferers or “the lucky ones” as we’ll refer to them, may seem like a mere cold and you may hear shouts of, “Stop moaning” or “I don’t know what all the fuss is about.”
Well, it’s not just a cold, you just don’t understand. IF YOU DON’T HAVE IT YOU DON’T KNOW.
Hay fever can have a huge impact on everyday life and make you question everyday decisions.
Such as; “Should I go outside?” Probably not. And if you do, you better be stocked up on tissues, because that nose will be running faster than Usain Bolt and there is only so much sleeve space you can use to wipe that single nose tear away.
Extreme cases of the symptoms can include, completely losing the ability to breath through your nose making you sound like you’ve just swallowed a sock. You’ll also have, sneezing fits. You can actually lose consciousness from a sneezing fit and they’ll annoy the s**t out of anyone in the vicinity a.k.a “the splash zone.”
The symptoms don’t stop there, try an itchy eye.
It’s kind of like the forbidden fruit of hay fever symptoms, you know you shouldn’t rub them, but it’s so bloody hard not to. The relief of an eye-rub is known to release the same endorphins as morphine, it feels lovely but it will only make the situation worse.
You think that’s bad, try having an itchy throat. Yep that’s a thing. It’s a horrible feeling at the back of your throat, which for some can be relieved by making noises that closely resemble the Velociraptor sound in Jurassic Park.
If you don’t know what I’m on about then check this out… annoying right?
There is whole host of other symptoms, but I think you get the message.
Hay fever knocks you for six every time…so what can you do to help it?
#1 The classic! DRUGS
Antihistamines, nasal sprays etc…you’ll need to take so much you’ll be asking if you can overdose on them or not.
Piriteze and Benadryl etc. are usually the first port of call. These babies can be in the form of tablets, nasal sprays, eye drops, you name it. They won’t come cheap though, oh no!
Looking to save yourself money? Get yourself down to Shoprite where you can purchase some for 86p, I can’t confirm if they any are different but let’s face it, none of them work anyway!
They reckon eating local honey before peak season will allow your body to adjust to the type of pollen in the air. So get yourself some St Mark’s honey and you’ll be reet!
***Disclaimer – I ate local honey on toast for a solid month and I’m still a snotty mess.***
#3 Cold chamomile tea bags
Applied straight to the eyes! Yes your read that right. Chamomile contain antioxidants and antihistamines apparently, so take a cold tea bag and compress round your eyes and it will supposedly reduce inflammation and discomfort!
We would recommend watching a YouTube tutorial to ensure you do this safely.
#3 Ginnie Nettle stings
A sting a day keeps the doctor away… apparently. Some folk believe stinging yourself daily with a nettle will stop the hay fever symptoms!?!?!? LUDICROUS.
Yes, Gin & Tonics. You’ll be pleased to know that good ol’ gin can act as a remedy for hay fever. The Island is in abundance of the stuff at the moment, so if you’re suffering get yourself to the nearest pub ASAP!
Often, you’ll try almost anything to relieve the pressuring grip of hay fever, but sadly there isn’t a cure. My best advice is really to just throw everything at it, try and stop it before it starts and maybe say a little prayer to the pollen gods.
My thoughts are with all the sufferers out there, stay strong.